Yard Sales

I have been spending my week preparing my junk for the 3 day garage sale I plan to have this weekend. I am getting rid of a lot of stuff, including quite a few nice antiques. When I price my items I make sure to research each one in order to sell them for a reasonable and realistic price. Despite this, I know that I will get some of "those" customers. What are those customers? "Those" customers are the type that freak out if anything is priced over $1. They are never convinced of the worth of something and they will do anything to bargain you into bankruptcy. My true feelings about these types are accurately portrayed in this rage comic I have put together:

In essence, buy it or gtfo.

Bonding over Faulty Technology

Years ago, my dad decided to enter the 21st century by putting remote controlled overhead light/fans into my bedroom, my parents' bedroom, and our living room. It was fine for a while until recently when "ghosts" seemed to enjoy turning our lights and fans on and off without our control. If I didn't manually turn my wall switch off before I went to bed, my light or fan would randomly go on in the middle of the night, inevitably waking me up. This happened to my parents as well and we were all confused.

Finally, my parents discovered that all three remotes worked for all three fans, meaning that when one person tried to turn on or off their light, the other lights would turn on or off. Now, this affect is really quite annoying, especially when my brother would come home at 4 am and turn on the living room light. But, there is always some humor in these events.

For example, the other day, my dad turned on his light, which turned mine off. In trying to correct my light, I turned his off. We began yelling back and forth as we fought to put our light at the setting that we wanted. After about 5 minutes of our battle royal, we just sat there laughing from our separate rooms. Eventually, my dad walked into my room and we continued to laugh for another 5 minutes. In reality, this event explains my relationship with my dad. He and I have these random inside jokes that we could bring up years and years after their conception. For example, there is a store near our house called "Tokyo Video." When we drove by the sign for the first time, we both said the name in our most stereotypical asian accent, and then laughed forever. Ever since then, my dad and I will randomly say it and we always seem to say it when the other is thinking it.

My dad and I are extremely different people, but when it comes to find stupid humor in everyday events, we couldn't be more compatible.

Airport Security?

Currently, I am sitting in the San Francisco Airport waiting for my flight that will depart in about an hour. I've been here since 5:30. Despite the terrible layover, I enjoyed my time by eating a bowl of soup while reading Harry Potter and the Order of the Phoenix, a classic, and listening to a mixture of Arcade Fire, Dawes, and Neutral Milk Hotel. Around 7, I finished my soup and decided to go sit at my gate and await my flight. When I found gate 88 I sat at the end of a row nearest to a Pete's Coffee and Tea so that I could sufficiently contemplate whether or not I needed a chai tea latte (I did). While contemplating I saw a man that had to be the model for the old guy from Up walking towards me with two suited personal following him. Now I was a bit surprised by this as it seemed like the little old man was doing nothing wrong. Despite this, the personal seemed determined to catch up to him. As this was happening a man who was sitting clear across the room came and sat near me, prompting me to think "WTF." But I ignored this gesture in order to see what these suit-clad strong men were after.

I realized I was wrong about the mens' target when they passed the man from Up and instead continued to the row of seats in front of the one I was perched on, reading. They proceeded to ask about the suitcase that was under the seat in front of me. I told them it was there when I got there (I actually hadn't noticed it until they mentioned it). The creeper who followed me explained the same thing. One of the suited men poked the bag with his foot prompting me to think "hey, I don't want to be anywhere near this bag" at which I moved clear across the room. The creepy man followed me. I only shook this man once I got up to "go to the bathroom" and when I returned I sat as far away as possible. Now, while I was away, the suited men had moved the suitcase to an empty service desk where it remained unattended   (strike one) for about a half hour (strike two) until a large man in yet another suit came to examine it. Now, I am no expert on airport security, but wouldn't it make sense that if there was a suspicious bag sitting alone at an airport that it would be seen as a matter of relative threat and importance? Call me old fashioned, but isn't this the subject of what those annoyingly chipper voices that come over the loudspeaker every 20 minutes say over and over again?

Maybe I am being paranoid but, check out the damn bag.

Yeah, that seems legit!

I've been looking for a sublessee on Craigslist because I'm going to Italy fall term. After I posted the ad, I got quite a few replies. One was especially interesting. The first time the person contacted me it was normal, but after she replied to tell me about herself and her name changed from "Beatriz" to "Beatrix," I figured something was up. By the way, if you want to pretend you are from a foreign country to hide the fact that you cannot speak english, Ireland really is not your best bet. I lobe reading as well. Enjoy. Hello,   Good to read back from you...Am glad that the place is available, am currently in Galway , Ireland, i will be coming there to further my education, so i will be coming there for my move in as soon as the space is ready for move in...But i will not be coming there to look at the room due to distance, and i would love to call you but my phone just got disconnected and i dont want to reconnect it cuz i will be relocating soon, but my step dad will call you asap, however if you have the pics of the room you can send it to me so that i can see the place and send it to my step dad to see it as well, Meanwhile let me tell you a little about myself. Am Beatriz Coker and am 23years old i lost my dad some years back when i was young so my mom had to remarry, so she got married to Mr Scott Andrew who is my step dad now he is a very busy business man. He has been the one who has been taking care of me all this while i believe he is a God sent to me cux i have never regretted a moment with him. I lobe reading,swimming and chatting with people around me and also make them happy. I have always been thinking of how i will affect peoples life positively by making donations to the less privileges cus when i looked at my pass when i lost my dad from the story my mom told me. I noticed it is not easy for people that has no parent. Presently i donate to (W.H.O) for the support of the motherless home. Although i donate little amount, but no amount is too small to help..Well i hope when we meet in person you will know more about me. Meanwhile my step dad will need the followings information to make payment to you ASAP   1....Your name in full   2...your Address in full with the zip code   3.....Your phone number.        I wait to have this information from you so that my step dad can make payment for the rental fee and security deposit in advance.

Digster